Mid-Valley Voice

Picking Your Wedding Theme

Most people don't see a need for a wedding theme. Of course, the theme for any wedding is "marriage."

However, when all the little planning details start to come together, you should have some cohesion to everything. With so many choices to make, having a theme helps to guide you to simple elegance. But beware, theme incorporation should be subtle. Too obvious theme elements can take away from the real reason for your special day and make the festivities feel like a theme party.

The season during which you hold your wedding can provide many cues for theme and color. Try a few of these seasonal suggestions to help make your wedding unique and fun.

Spring: What leaps to mind when you hear "spring wedding?" Flowers! Of course, every wedding has flowers. When flowers are your theme, you can incorporate them not only in dècor, but in other decorative elements as well.

- Use a subtly flowered fabric for your bridesmaids' dresses.

- Give your guests flowery favors. Seeds for their gardens in decorative pots are one way to do that. Bud vases are another.

- Incorporate fresh flowers in your cake design or have your baker craft them out of fondant.

- Use pressed flower stationary for invitations and programs. You'll find these little lovelies at many invitation providers.

- Ask your caterer to include flowers in your menu - edible flowers look lovely in salads and as garnish for your main course.

- Colors for spring often include muted pastels, such as buttercup yellow, lilac, pale blue, carnation pink and sage green. These colors can be found in many of the season's flowers.

Summer: When it's hot outside, choose a sunny theme that tells guests that your wedding is the cool place to be? A tropical paradise! A fuchsia wedding dress would be inappropriate, but putting a taste of the tropics in the details can go a long way.

- Feature faux "Tiki" torches as part of the reception lighting scheme.

- Serve fruity drinks with little umbrellas at the bar, and have sangria available in carafes at the tables.

- Make dried fruits and nuts available for snacking.

- Include tropical flowers in bouquets and boutonnieres, and flowered leis as part of the table design.

- Incorporate some reggae music into your playlist.

- Hot colors for those hot summer nights include electric blue, royal purple, magenta, lime green and chili-pepper red. While these colors may seem like a throwback to the 1980s, when you incorporated these hues using a simple elegant touch, they can help make your wedding the most festive fete in town.

Fall: When the leaves turn from green into beautiful fall hues and the air starts to have a nip of cold, what comes to mind but autumn harvest? There are many opportunities to incorporate a little flavor of fall into your wedding celebration.

- Serve cider-inspired drinks and ales.

- Use a leaf motif throughout all aspects of your wedding.

- Include fall wildflowers in the bouquets, boutonnieres and dècor.

- Serve spice, apple or pumpkin cake with cream cheese icing decorated with leaves and fall flowers.

- Use cornucopias with various fruits for snacking and centerpieces.

- Look to the trees for the colors of the season. Rich golds, chocolate browns, deep burgundies, dark eggplant and spicy pumpkin can turn your wedding into a harvest of love.

Winter: Whether it's cold or not, when you proceed down the aisle, walk in a winter wonderland. Winter provides a serene backdrop for your nuptials. Consider adding these chilly touches to enhance the sparkle and elegance.

- Include silver sparkle everywhere you can - flowers, dresses, centerpieces.

- Serve warm drinks along with traditional bar fare - hot toddies and hot chocolate.

- If there is snow on the ground, make sure to take some outdoor pictures, even if it's cold. You and the wedding party will look like snow angels.

- Have the bride and bridesmaids carry faux fur muffs - very "Dr. Zhivago."

- Use winter-like fabrics, such as velvets, in dresses and dècor.

- Plan your wedding festivities with a "holiday" theme.

- Colors for winter weddings should be cool. These blue-based hues can include ice blue, silver, red and emerald green. Set against the crispness of a winter day, cool colors can warm the heart.

Seasonless style: The combination of black and white always makes an elegant statement. It is especially fitting for an evening wedding. You can incorporate black and white in any number of ways - dresses, accessories, flowers, favors and even dessert. This study in contrasts can pull it all together.

Music to Marry By

When you envision yourself walking down the aisle, what do you hear? Music sets the tone for the celebration that is your marriage. You have many choices when it comes to music for your ceremony.

Selecting Your Musicians: Your wedding musical ensemble can either be grandiose or subtle. For a more subtle sound, combine two or three flutes with a keyboard. You can include violins, harps and trumpets if you're looking for a bigger sound. And when it comes to voices, it's usually best to feature just one voice with a vocal style you enjoy, or two who combine to create harmonies.

Dealing With Religious Music Requirements/Restrictions: If you have to include certain religious music, such as the Catholic "Holy Holy" or the Jewish "Simon Tov Heranu Shalom," your musicians should be able to accommodate your needs. It's their job to be familiar with religious music, and professional musicians can make arrangements to learn a special piece if given enough time to find musical arrangements.

Selection Suggestions:

Prelude: The prelude music begins when the doors open to guests approximately 20 minute before the ceremony begins. The prelude will serenade your guests as they enter and take their seats.

- "Water Music" - Handel

- "Flower Song" from "Lakme" - Delibes

- "Minuet" from "Orpheus"

- "Sheep May Safely Graze" - Bach

Processional: This is the music that will be played as your bridesmaids meet their groomsmen and for the bride's grand entrance. You can choose just one of these pieces or a combination of two.

- "Canon in D Minor" - Pachelbal

- "Entre'acte to Act 3" from "Carmen" - Bizet

- "The Bridal Chorus" ("Here Comes the Bride") - Wagner

- "Trumpet Voluntary in D" - Purcell

- "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" - Bach

Interlude: Select interlude pieces to be played during especially meaningful moments during your ceremony, such as the ring exchange, the lighting of the unity candles, the breaking of the glass, and/or the presentation of flowers to the parents of the bride and groom.

- "Only Time" - Enya

- "The Gift of Love" (Traditional) - arranged by Hopson

- "Ave Maria" - Schubert

- "O Mio Babbino Caro" - Puccini

Recessional: During the recessional, the bride and groom take their first walk as husband and wife. Celebratory music is in order.

- "Ode to Joy" - Beethoven

- "Vivace" from "Flute Sonata in F" - Telemann

- Fourth movement from "Austia Flute Sonata in F" - Handel

- "Wedding March" - Mendelssohn

Band or DJ?

The music at your wedding can make or break the mood. To keep things moving and upbeat, you must depend on either a professional disc jockey (DJ) or live band. The following compilation details the attributes of both, to help you decide the perfect music choice for you.

DJ: A good DJ does much more than pop in the CDs. He or she sets the tone for your entire reception. The DJ usually serves as a master of ceremonies, announcing each of the important events of the reception - from the entrance of the wedding party to the last dance of the evening. A charismatic DJ gets all the guests involved and keeps the party going.

As to price, a DJ may be more economical than a band - you're paying for the time of just one person as opposed to a group of people. The DJ service you choose should use professional sound and lighting equipment. He or she should also provide a wireless microphone to use during toasts. And, most importantly, the DJ should have a wide selection of music.

When you use a DJ, you'll have access to a variety of music genres and songs - from country to soul from rock to jazz. You don't have to stick with just one type of music. And if you want to use a song the DJ doesn't carry, you can always bring it along yourself. You'll be able to play any recording available. When your DJ takes a break, it need not stop the party. He or she can play multiple selections in a row to keep the party going.

Make sure to get a DJ whose personality and emcee skills are exciting and attention-getting. This doesn't mean he or she needs to be loud and obnoxious - a quiet, laid-back DJ may be just the person for a certain crowd. However, a dull DJ can kill the mood and drag down the entire reception. Make sure you see your DJ in action before booking him or her.

Band: A live band can really get your guests in a party mood while, by example, setting the scene for the celebration. A good bandleader will not only act as master of ceremonies, but also encourage guest interaction. He or she can get a feel for the room and pick up the pace when there seems to be a lull in the action.

Live music can be exhilarating for guests. And many musicians specialize in particular musical genres. Bands are available that play Motown classics, swing, country, rock, pop, music from the 80s, or any other type of music that gets your guests' feet moving.

A live band also offers an air of sophistication to a party. Even guests who won't get up and dance can admire the artistry of professional musicians.

For the most part, a band will be more expensive than a DJ. After all, you're paying for the talent of several live musicians. Also, when a band takes a break, the transition is more noticeable. Guests will likely leave the dance floor even if a CD is played. Some bands take five-minute breaks, others take 20-minute breaks. Be sure to check out the break policies of the bands you're talking to before signing a contract. And you'll want to see a live performance to make sure the band can match any recordings that may have caught your ear.

No Matter Which Way You Go ... Whether band or DJ, there are certain details you should cover with the musical entertainment for your reception before booking them:

• Are they available? The best bands and DJ services may be booked 18 months to one year in advance. And some dates are especially popular. Try to preview reception entertainment as far in advance as you can so you have many quality options available to you.
• What is their style? Are they outgoing, getting each guest on the dance floor? Or are they quiet, letting the music speak for itself? Make sure their style matches your preference.
• What will they wear? For a more formal affair, will they dress black-tie? Suits? Jeans? Make sure to specify what dress you'd prefer. And don't forget to ask about accessories. If you don't want a "Cat in the Hat" striped top hat brought out, make sure you specify that.
• What is included in their package price? How many hours will they play? How many breaks will they take?
• What is their overtime charge? If you choose to extend the reception, will they continue performing? What rate will they charge?
• Do you get to choose the musical selection? Must you list each and every song you want played, or will they determine the list? Will they take guest requests?
• Do they have back-ups? If your DJ or one of the performers is unable to make it at the last minute, who will appear in his or her place? By the same token, do they have back-up equipment available in case something unexpected happens?
• Can you see them live at another wedding? Most bands and DJs can arrange for you to see a live performance. As noted earlier, it's a good idea to see a live performance to determine if they're the right choice for you.
• Can you specifically prohibit the playing of a certain song? Sick of "The Electric Slide?" Don't feel like quacking along to "The Duck Dance?" Afraid "The Macarena" will ruin your night? Make sure you can specify which song you don't want to hear, as well as the ones you do.

As you know, it is imperative to get all details in writing before you hire your band or DJ. Carefully read over the contract to make sure everything is covered, so you can dance all night without a worry.

Put on Your Dancing Shoes

Your reception will have some very special moments that you will remember the rest of your life, especially the ceremonial dances you share with your loved ones.

You'll want to select songs that suit you and your style. In addition, these musical selections should reflect your relationships with these special men in your life: your new husband, your father, stepfather, grandfather or uncles.

Check out the list below to find some melodious options for these dances. Then put on your dancing shoes.

The First Dance: Whether you prefer classic standards or something a little more modern, you can be sure to find the perfect song for your first dance as a married couple:

Standards:

• "At Last" (Etta James)
• "The Best Is Yet to Come" (Frank Sinatra)
• "Can't Help Falling in Love" (Elvis Presley)
• "Close to You" (The Carpenters)
• "Embraceable You" (Nat King Cole)
• "Here and Now" (Luther Vandross)
• "It Had to Be You" (Harry Connick Jr.)
• "Our Love Is Here to Stay" (Billie Holiday)
• "We've Only Just Begun" (The Carpenters)
• "Your Song" (Elton John)

Rock Power Ballads:

• "Amazed" (Lonestar)
• "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" (Aerosmith)
• "Open Arms" (Journey)
• "Time After Time" (Cyndi Lauper)
• "We Belong" (Pat Benatar)
• "You Got to Let Love Rule" (Lenny Kravitz)

Modern Marriage Music:

• "Crash" (Dave Matthews Band)
• "Ice Cream" (Sarah McLachlan)
• "In Your Eyes" (Peter Gabriel)
• "Kiss Me" (Six Pence None the Richer)
• "Let My Love Open the Door [to Your Heart]" (Pete Townsend)
• "Tonight, Tonight" (Smashing Pumpkins)
• "Wonderful Tonight" (Eric Clapton)

Father-Daughter Dance: Weddings are very emotional for the father-of-the-bride. He's just escorted his little girl down the aisle and presented her to her husband. The father-daughter dance, amidst all the activity that makes up a wedding, is a chance for dad and his daughter to spend some time together before she departs the family and begins her new life.

• "Butterfly Kisses" (Bob Carlisle)- Although this song may be a little sappy, it brings a tear to the eye of every father who's given away his daughter at the altar.
• "In My Life" (The Beatles)
• "Isn't She Lovely" (Stevie Wonder)
• "My Girl" (The Temptations)
• "Thank Heaven for Little Girls" (Maurice Chevalier)
• "Unforgettable" (Nat King Cole and Natalie Cole)
• "The Way You Look Tonight" (Frank Sinatra)

Mother-Son Dance: At his wedding, every man can be a mama's boy, at least while the mother-of-the-groom dances with her special guy.

• "Mama" (Boys II Men)
• "Mockingbird" (Carly Simon and James Taylor")
• "My Funny Valentine" (Frank Sinatra)
• "You Are the Sunshine of My Life" (Stevie Wonder)

Wedding Party Dance: They've been your friends, they've stood by you. Now, they'll dance with you. Pick a special song for your wedding party.

• "Friends Are Friends Forever" (Michael W. Smith)
• "I'll Remember" (Madonna)
• "I Will Remember You" (Sarah McLachlan)
• "Stand By Me" (Ben E. King)
• "You've Got a Friend" (James Taylor)