Mid-Valley Voice

Picking Your Wedding Theme

Most people don't see a need for a wedding theme. Of course, the theme for any wedding is "marriage."

However, when all the little planning details start to come together, you should have some cohesion to everything. With so many choices to make, having a theme helps to guide you to simple elegance. But beware, theme incorporation should be subtle. Too obvious theme elements can take away from the real reason for your special day and make the festivities feel like a theme party.

The season during which you hold your wedding can provide many cues for theme and color. Try a few of these seasonal suggestions to help make your wedding unique and fun.

Spring: What leaps to mind when you hear "spring wedding?" Flowers! Of course, every wedding has flowers. When flowers are your theme, you can incorporate them not only in dècor, but in other decorative elements as well.

- Use a subtly flowered fabric for your bridesmaids' dresses.

- Give your guests flowery favors. Seeds for their gardens in decorative pots are one way to do that. Bud vases are another.

- Incorporate fresh flowers in your cake design or have your baker craft them out of fondant.

- Use pressed flower stationary for invitations and programs. You'll find these little lovelies at many invitation providers.

- Ask your caterer to include flowers in your menu - edible flowers look lovely in salads and as garnish for your main course.

- Colors for spring often include muted pastels, such as buttercup yellow, lilac, pale blue, carnation pink and sage green. These colors can be found in many of the season's flowers.

Summer: When it's hot outside, choose a sunny theme that tells guests that your wedding is the cool place to be? A tropical paradise! A fuchsia wedding dress would be inappropriate, but putting a taste of the tropics in the details can go a long way.

- Feature faux "Tiki" torches as part of the reception lighting scheme.

- Serve fruity drinks with little umbrellas at the bar, and have sangria available in carafes at the tables.

- Make dried fruits and nuts available for snacking.

- Include tropical flowers in bouquets and boutonnieres, and flowered leis as part of the table design.

- Incorporate some reggae music into your playlist.

- Hot colors for those hot summer nights include electric blue, royal purple, magenta, lime green and chili-pepper red. While these colors may seem like a throwback to the 1980s, when you incorporated these hues using a simple elegant touch, they can help make your wedding the most festive fete in town.

Fall: When the leaves turn from green into beautiful fall hues and the air starts to have a nip of cold, what comes to mind but autumn harvest? There are many opportunities to incorporate a little flavor of fall into your wedding celebration.

- Serve cider-inspired drinks and ales.

- Use a leaf motif throughout all aspects of your wedding.

- Include fall wildflowers in the bouquets, boutonnieres and dècor.

- Serve spice, apple or pumpkin cake with cream cheese icing decorated with leaves and fall flowers.

- Use cornucopias with various fruits for snacking and centerpieces.

- Look to the trees for the colors of the season. Rich golds, chocolate browns, deep burgundies, dark eggplant and spicy pumpkin can turn your wedding into a harvest of love.

Winter: Whether it's cold or not, when you proceed down the aisle, walk in a winter wonderland. Winter provides a serene backdrop for your nuptials. Consider adding these chilly touches to enhance the sparkle and elegance.

- Include silver sparkle everywhere you can - flowers, dresses, centerpieces.

- Serve warm drinks along with traditional bar fare - hot toddies and hot chocolate.

- If there is snow on the ground, make sure to take some outdoor pictures, even if it's cold. You and the wedding party will look like snow angels.

- Have the bride and bridesmaids carry faux fur muffs - very "Dr. Zhivago."

- Use winter-like fabrics, such as velvets, in dresses and dècor.

- Plan your wedding festivities with a "holiday" theme.

- Colors for winter weddings should be cool. These blue-based hues can include ice blue, silver, red and emerald green. Set against the crispness of a winter day, cool colors can warm the heart.

Seasonless style: The combination of black and white always makes an elegant statement. It is especially fitting for an evening wedding. You can incorporate black and white in any number of ways - dresses, accessories, flowers, favors and even dessert. This study in contrasts can pull it all together.

The Ceremony Location

You know the "who," "what," "why" and probably the "when." But in regard to your wedding, there is no more important "where" than the site of your ceremony.

This facility is the place where you will make those lifelong promises to love and to cherish. In your pictures you will forever be standing in that spot, wearing the most beautiful dress, with your husband lovingly gazing at you, and your friends and family fondly observing.

Here are some ideas to guide you toward picking the perfect site for your ceremony:

- If you want to get married in a place of worship, you should pick one to which you feel connected. That could be where you currently attend services or the place you went during childhood. It could be somewhere you’ve never been but have admired from afar.

- An outdoor wedding can be beautiful. Whether under a gazebo, at a park, or in a field, an outdoor wedding seems to come with Mother Nature’s seal of approval. Be careful to consider seasonal weather factors. Certain times of year are more prone to inclement weather than others.

- In a museum or gallery, your wedding will be surrounded by beautiful objects. You can choose sites that display works that match your personal preferences, whether you enjoy the modern, classical, naturalistic or abstract.

- A wedding at home gives you the opportunity to recite your vows in a place that is near and dear to your heart. Though it will require that you have enough room to accommodate your guest list, a home wedding will definitely have a personal touch that no other location offers.

Your officiant can help you determine your options regarding ceremony sites. There are some site restrictions if you are having a religious ceremony.

Music to Marry By

When you envision yourself walking down the aisle, what do you hear? Music sets the tone for the celebration that is your marriage. You have many choices when it comes to music for your ceremony.

Selecting Your Musicians: Your wedding musical ensemble can either be grandiose or subtle. For a more subtle sound, combine two or three flutes with a keyboard. You can include violins, harps and trumpets if you're looking for a bigger sound. And when it comes to voices, it's usually best to feature just one voice with a vocal style you enjoy, or two who combine to create harmonies.

Dealing With Religious Music Requirements/Restrictions: If you have to include certain religious music, such as the Catholic "Holy Holy" or the Jewish "Simon Tov Heranu Shalom," your musicians should be able to accommodate your needs. It's their job to be familiar with religious music, and professional musicians can make arrangements to learn a special piece if given enough time to find musical arrangements.

Selection Suggestions:

Prelude: The prelude music begins when the doors open to guests approximately 20 minute before the ceremony begins. The prelude will serenade your guests as they enter and take their seats.

- "Water Music" - Handel

- "Flower Song" from "Lakme" - Delibes

- "Minuet" from "Orpheus"

- "Sheep May Safely Graze" - Bach

Processional: This is the music that will be played as your bridesmaids meet their groomsmen and for the bride's grand entrance. You can choose just one of these pieces or a combination of two.

- "Canon in D Minor" - Pachelbal

- "Entre'acte to Act 3" from "Carmen" - Bizet

- "The Bridal Chorus" ("Here Comes the Bride") - Wagner

- "Trumpet Voluntary in D" - Purcell

- "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" - Bach

Interlude: Select interlude pieces to be played during especially meaningful moments during your ceremony, such as the ring exchange, the lighting of the unity candles, the breaking of the glass, and/or the presentation of flowers to the parents of the bride and groom.

- "Only Time" - Enya

- "The Gift of Love" (Traditional) - arranged by Hopson

- "Ave Maria" - Schubert

- "O Mio Babbino Caro" - Puccini

Recessional: During the recessional, the bride and groom take their first walk as husband and wife. Celebratory music is in order.

- "Ode to Joy" - Beethoven

- "Vivace" from "Flute Sonata in F" - Telemann

- Fourth movement from "Austia Flute Sonata in F" - Handel

- "Wedding March" - Mendelssohn

Flowers With Style

Of all the decisions you make in association with your wedding, choosing your flowers can be the most intimidating. There are so many varieties, breeds, and subtle variations in color. And that's not even taking into account the seasonal factors such as what flowers are available at the time of year for your wedding.

The following listing includes some ideas on which to base your arrangements, the best types of flowers to use and some seasonal choices.

Bridal Bouquets: Your bridal bouquet is perhaps the most important - and most photographed - arrangement in your wedding. Consider these ideas when picking your bouquet:

- A gift from the groom. Since the bridal bouquet is a gift from the husband-to-be, let him pick the flowers (with some assistance, of course). Then in those moments before the ceremony when you are holding your bouquet, you'll remember that your groom chose those flowers especially for you. And you'll be able to hold the bouquet of blooms close to you as you process down the aisle.

- A living memory. What did your mother carry in her wedding bouquet? What about your grandmother? Create a tradition by replicating your mom's or grandmother's bouquet.

- A study in contrasts. If you want your bouquet to stand out against your white dress, carry bright flowers.

- A fragrant bundle of joy. A white bouquet featuring a combination of sturdy orchids, elegant calla lilies, sweet gardenias and traditional lilies of the valley will surround you with a natural perfume.

- The shape of your joy. Perhaps you want the extravagance of a cascade, the simple elegance of a round bunch, the beauty of long-stemmed blooms laying in the crook of your arm, or the pure romance of a heart. The shape of your bouquet should reflect both your personal style and the style and theme you've set for your wedding.

- A matching pair. Your groom's boutonniere can be a very miniature version of your bouquet, keeping the same flowers, hues and shape but on a smaller scale.

Bridesmaids' Bouquets and Groomsmen's Boutonnieres: Your bridesmaids' flowers should match the colors in their dresses, and the groomsmen's boutonnieres should match the color scheme. Following are a few fresh ideas for these flowers:

- If your wedding features multiple colors, have each bridesmaid carry a bouquet that features one of the hues. For example, if you're having a spring wedding, consider having one bridesmaid carry lavender flowers, another yellow, another pink and another peach.

- The groomsmen escorting them should have a boutonniere in a matching color.

Use flowers with symbolism that reflect your values:

- Blue violets - faithfulness

- Forget-me-nots - true love

- Honeysuckle - bonds of love

- Ivy - fidelity

- Jasmine - joy

- Lilies of the valley - return of happiness

- Myrtle - remembrance (especially poignant if you're remembering some dearly departed love ones during your celebration)

- Red chrysanthemums, roses or tulips - love

- Instead of carrying bouquets, have each bridesmaid carry a single bloom to make an elegant, bold statement.

Mother-of-the-Bride/Mother-of-the-Groom Nosegays: Don't forget mom! Small bouquets make the mothers look lovely when they're being escorted down the aisle. While these bouquets should be consistent in color and style with the rest of the blooms you're using, let the mothers personalize their flowers. If they have a particular flowers that is special to them, ask the florist to include it.

Floral Dècor: When discussing the flowers with your florist, don't forget altar flowers, pew decorations, as well as reception centerpieces and displays. Let your florist know your wedding theme and style. If possible provide photographs of your ceremony and reception sites. He or she should be able to provide some innovative ideas for your arrangements.

Choosing Your Officiant

Your officiant does more than oversee the marriage ceremony. He or she is the person who can help you bring your dreams and ideas to life.

The officiant will keep you informed of any requirements or restrictions when it comes to your ceremony. Since you may be working with someone you don't know well, be sure to ask detailed questions to determine if you and your potential officiant are a match made in heaven.

On the phone, before you meet in person, find out the following:

- Is the officiant available on the date you've chosen? Obviously, if he or she isn't available on your date, this isn't going to work out.

- What, if any, documentation is required for the first meeting? Some religions require baptism certificates or other documentation.

- Is he or she open to personalized vows, particular readings or music? Some religions have restrictions on using secular music or readings. Some require that you use traditional vows.

- Are pre-wedding counseling or classes required? Again, some religions require couples to attend retreats or "marriage classes" before allowing them to tie the knot.

- Is there an officiant's ceremony fee? Fees for an officiant can range from approximately $20-$200 for performing a service. If you require the participation of other lay people, such as musicians, it is likely they also will have a fee.

If you feel comfortable with the officiant on the phone and can accommodate his or her requirements and restrictions, you will want to schedule a meeting before sealing the deal. When you meet, go over the details of the site and the ceremony.

Including the following:

- Tour the site, noting the capacity, general layout and accessibility. Be sure to note wheelchair accessibility if necessary.

- What the site provides vs. what you'll need to provide - i.e., the runner, flowers, candles.

- Your ideas for music and readings so the officiant can tell you if there are any restrictions.

- Your choice of vows if you're not going the traditional route.

- Your thoughts on the sermon the officiant plans to deliver. He or she may offer to let you hear it in advance.

- Dress code for your site. Some religious sites require a covered head, sleeved clothes or other wardrobe restrictions.

- Any documentation matters including the marriage certificate and marriage license.

- Accessibility for the photographer and videographer, so you can let them know where they will and won't be allowed to go at the ceremony site.

- Officiant and site availability for the rehearsal.